Sugar Baby Profile, Messaging and Dating Etiquette.

Hello gorgeous ladies.  Up very early this Monday thanks to Objection having to go home to get ready for work. Starting to feel a bit better, but still no work.  I’ll probably be better by tomorrow.

You’re revamping your SA profile, and you’re wanting to attract attractive, funny and wealthy men.  Sure, a few have messaged you, but after you’ve replied, they seem to drop off the radar.  Maybe you’ve even gone on a couple of dates, but after the date, they’re no longer interested.  You’re starting to wonder what you’re doing wrong after the third time of being turned down. Here are five simple ways (each) to boost your chances of landing a SD with some Sugar Baby etiquette tips!:

Profile Etiquette:

  1. Be descriptive. List things you like, find attractive, hobbies that you have, your personality type, etc.  Same goes for what you’re looking for. If you don’t want a man over 40, then say that you’re looking for a ‘younger sugar daddy.’ Don’t beat around the bush because you’ll waste both parties time.
  2. If you want your allowance to be a certain amount, list it.  Don’t list “Open Amount – Negotiable”  for your allowance if you have you mind set on a certain amount. 
  3. Use a good picture, make sure it’s clear, and appropriate.  Listing pictures of you in your underwear will attract the men looking for escorts.  Don’t know what kind of picture to p
    ost? Here are some tips.
  4. Use good English! No one wants to read “Hai, mai name is RaChEl!!!  I luvvvvvv, pupies”
  5. Don’t exaggerate of flat out lie on your dating profile. We all have things we don’t like about ourselves, but when you lie about something obvious, don’t kid yourself or the person! Not only will you be cheating yourself, your sugar daddy will soon learn that when you put “slim” you should have put “a few extra pounds” or “overweight”.  Anyway, a BBW Sugar baby should never be ashamed!

Do you know what to look for in a Sugar Daddy profile?

I’m speaking of Seeking Arrangement directly, but, if you’re browsing profiles you want to look for

  1. Diamond Club Members / Certified Members: They pay a significant amount of money to be one.
  2. Decent pictures are a huge plus.  If I’m seeing a guy wearing Old Navy, I’m a bit skeptical.  Also look fora good handful of pictures. Just one would also make me a bit skeptical.
  3. A really detailed “Arrangement I am seeking”  For example:
    “I am looking for a fun girl for a long or short term arrangement with a monthly/weekly allowance for her. The amount depends on the person and her availability. I had my last sugar baby for almost 6 years. She would have been still here with me but her mom suffered a stroke and could not feed herself or bathe so she moved back to upstate NY to care for her mom. Tell me what your looking for or need and leave me a message. IF YOU CAN OR ARE INTERESTED IN MOVING/RELOCATING TO HOUSTON TO LIVE FOR AN ALLOWANCE AND POSSIBLE APT LET ME KNOW WHEN YOU CONTACT ME”   He is upfront and honest about what he wants
  4. Look at the “About me” also.  This is also important (but, in my opinion, not as important as the “arrangement I am seeking.”) I think the About Me is LESS important because some people have a really difficult time telling people about themselves. They should however, know what kind of arrangement they are looking for.    A good about me would be the following:
    “When a lady chooses to enter my life, she has a mentor, friend, and supporter for life, whether we remain lovers or not. While I enjoy dating and am polyamorous and a philogynist (look up, its fun), I both admire and respect any lady I date.
    As said, I’m open to a relationship or even marriage, however I will never settle for less than the right not-so-perfect partner! (emphasis on partner) So, until then I enjoy meeting, befriending, having unbridled fun, and/or dating attractive WHITE, and FIT ladies under 36 (or look it), who lack drama, enjoy fine dining, wine, concerts, art, music, travel, fun, and adventure.
    I’m not arrogant, possessive, jealous, or emotionally needy like many other affluent men, so I have been told. I am VERY secure and comfortable in my own skin and who I am and I am extremely open-minded! Close-minded women need not apply.”
    He has A LOT more, but, he is very open and honest, and I appreciate that about him and the message he is conveying. I don’t get a feel of a “con” here.
  5. Always look out for bad English and bad grammar (unless they’re foreign) and the term “play.” Again, an example would be this man, who had the title “Waht to play”:
    “Older man (57)  seeking a younger daytime playmateArrangement I am Seeking

    I’m Seeking:
    Sugar Baby (Female)
    My Budget:
    Less than US$1,000 monthly
    “I can help you if you can help me”
  6. People who say, multiple times, “I AM REAL!”  make me believe they are not real.  Maybe some of you have had a different experience with that, though.
  7. Good headers:  “Looking for a smart lady.”  “Looking for a good friend and maybe more” “Looking for the right lady.” “Looking for a woman”  Bad headers: “WHAT’S UP LADIES” “New at this…” “Looking 4 HOTT women”

Messaging Etiquette:

  1. Again, Use good English.  When a Sugar Daddy emails me (unless he’s foreign) then I always look for good English. If he emails me with “Ay baby, wanna hit up my digits?” I’m not interested.  The same goes for messaging men. “Hey, u wanna go out with me?”  Will usually not attract them 
  2. Don’t reply with two sentences if someone messages you two paragraphs because it’s very rude.  He took time and effort into writing too you (unless he copied and pasted his about me.) Take time to reply, and word yourself carefully. For example, I wouldn’t rewrite my about me in different words.  I’d give more information.
  3. Actually read their profiles.  Sure, it may be long, but do you really want to ask two paragraph worth of questions that are already on his profile?  If you’ve read “I’m a huge animal lover” you could reply with “I saw you love animals, me too!  I’ve always been a dog person, but right now I don’t have the time for one.”
  4. Don’t fly to meet a sugar daddy. If a sugar daddy wants to meet you after the first day, then respectfully decline.  Flying to meet a sugar daddy has more cons than pros if you’re unsure of their identity.
  5. Don’t seem like a desperate sugar baby. Stating that you need money immediately is a huge turn off for Sugar daddies, and rarely will that approach ever be effective
First Date Etiquette
  1. Dress to Impress. Keep in mind you’re wanting to impress a wealthy, respectable man… Not the manager of Burger King.  Try and dress Classy over Trashy, brush your teeth and look as presentable.
  2. Be Polite and Grateful.  Be grateful to him and let him know you appreciate his time.  Also be polite, not only to a pot SD, but to others around you also.  If you’re acting like an angel to a pot and then telling a waitress that you hope she gets hit by a bus because she got your order wrong (I’ve witnessed this happen) then the SD will soon see that you’re either putting on an act, or you’re crazy and rude.
  3. Have pleasant conversation. Don’t be a bore.  Men don’t care about the big fight Snooki and Jionni had and how they took a break, or the fact that you finally finished watching all seasons of ANTM.  They want to be able to talk to someone stimulating and intelligent.
  4. Don’t ask for your allowance on the firsy day, because you seem desperate.  After the date, go home and send him a thank you email, and ask him if he is interested in ant further arrangement. If he brings the arrangement up during the date and you have good chemistry, then great.  If he doesn’t bring it up, just wait until you get home to send that email.
  5. Don’t Beat a Dead Horse. I love this English expression. If you don’t feel anything for your sugar daddy, but he does for you… Or if he wants sex, and you refuse, then why would you keep leading him on?
Dating Etiquette
  1. Don’t be a burden. If you’ve set an allowance and you need more later down the road, then that can be worked out and arranged. However, when you start asking for more and more and more, then you’re just trying to milk him for the ride.
  2. Don’t be clingy. Sometimes it’s hard not to develop feelings for our sugar daddies, but keep in mind that most of the time, the ‘feelings’ that you have can be infatuation.  Texting your sugar daddy all the time, calling him none stop, and stalking him on Facebook wont do much for you. Becoming jealous and possessive will scare him away, and later down the road, you’ll regret it 100%
  3. Don’t be invasive. His personal life is his personal life.  If he has a wife and kids back home and chooses not to talk about them, then don’t ask for details.  If he doesn’t like to talk about his work, don’t expect him too.
  4. Don’t start expecting things or become too comfortable. The money that you receive from your SD can get to your head sometimes.  You start expecting it, and you start depending on it, which leads to a handful of problems. If you’re financially dependent on your sugar daddy, then you can end up in a load of trouble and debt. Some SD’s can use this to control you. Be careful and save money!
  5. Always be respectful and thank him! Again, don’t get too comfortable.  Always thank your SD for helping you.  Thank him verbally, thank him physically, and stroke his big fat ego.  Remember, he is helping you out, and it’s not hard for them to find another SB to take care of. Be the special SB that he wants to take care of.
Good luck girls!  Sometimes it’s not the Sugar daddy that needs help but us, and it takes a lot to admit that for some!  ❤  Keep these tips in mind in the future, because you never know when they will come in handy!

11 thoughts on “Sugar Baby Profile, Messaging and Dating Etiquette.

  1. Wonderful blog.

    I have been a SB for 3 years now and can honestly say it works for me. He’s paid my way through grad school, rent, shopping, and trips. However, I see that my situation has changed with him he has given me the RING (I wear it) but must break this off ASAP… He’s too relaxed now and is starting to slip on doing what he used to do.

    This is when things become complicated in SB/SD relationships. Never let these guys get to assured that you need them because they WILL STOP doing what they knew the whole arrangement was structured on. Put them to task and as a last resort WALK away graciously (because it’s just not proper to run in Jimmy Choo or Louboutin) :-)!

  2. Hi! I’m a foreign student looking for a SD, I am about to start my profile on a website, but there’s a part that says “headed” and gives no further explanation. Can somebody help me understand it?

    Does it mean like what am I looking for with my SD? Or where I’m heading in life… Haha I’m hopeless I know lol

  3. Hello Elsy,
    I got a really urgent question. So I’ve been interested in getting a sugar daddy so I came across your blog. It’s very helpful. I registered on and guess what, after 1 week or so, I received a wink from a guy and I clicked to check his profile. I saw under “Arrangements Seeking”, he put EXACTLY the same thing that you put here about having a SB for 6 years and she had to leave to take care of her mom in NY. Even the wordings are exactly the same…. So I thought maybe you took him as an example which makes sense. However, I saw he just created the profile on June 10th, 2013, and your blog was written in 2011! I’m a little worried if he put that because he read your blog??? So maybe he’s lying??? HELP ME PLEASE!!!

    Thanks a lot!


    • Wow Angelina. Could you possibly send me the link? I did take that paragraph from another SD blog, but that was back in 2011, when I wrote it! If I could see it, I could verify if that was the blog I had paraphrased from.
      Contactelsy(at)gmail(dot)com is my email if you want to reach me there!

      • Elsy, I have replied you with the link in your gmail. Also, I have asked about something else in the email as well. Thanks for all your help and the heads out! ❤ Please post more blogs about SD/SB related articles! I have never had a SD yet. I'm looking forward to getting my first one. I need your absolute guidance and tips!


    • Also, Angelina, the profile I paraphrased from had this under his about me verses under what he was seeking. I’m willing to bet it was taken from someones profile if it was anything different

  4. hi elsy,
    thank you so much for your tips! they were exactly what i was looking for.
    i did most of them already, but was wanting to know how to present myself on the first date. ( dress to impress is perfect )
    now my main issue, is that i live in a small country in the Mediterranean area, and most of the SD are from america, and i dont see much around my area. neither am i getting a lot of requests or options. so far only one guy has tried to contact me from my area and even he has bailed.
    what should i do?

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