Back in Business

Hello Sugar world.

I’m back, after a few months of being MIA.  I know a lot of you must have thought I’d gone off and lived happily ever after with Objection and forgotten about you all. I’ve received a copious amount of lovely emails and facebook messages from you all. It’s been such a comfort to know you all enjoyed reading my blog, and I’ve still received 100+ views per day, despite not posting.  🙂 Love you girls.

I bet you’ve all been wondering where I’ve been, as I did pretty much fall off the face of the earth…

As you girls may remember, when Objection proposed, I was elated, yet at the same time I worried a lot.  Objection had been offered a job in another state, and we’d finally bought an apartment together. So, allow me to pick up where we left off whilst trying to make this short…

January was supposed to be a really exciting time for me.  I had essentially got the man of my dreams.  I was making the transition to move to a beautiful home, with the idea of moving to Florida.  Two homes in one country, and people would have swooned at the idea, but to be honest, I adore New York.  Florida doesn’t appeal to me as a place to live. (Sorry Floridaians.)  I’d choose the city over the beach any day, and it caused a big rift between Objection and I… Maybe it wasn’t fair of me to ask himnotto take the job, but, honestly, I knew I wouldn’t be happy in Florida.

It was hard for me, because I’m so young, yet I felt like I was taking on a lot more than I could handle at that minute… A marriage, being a wife, and starting a family too? Maybe I’m just too immature, or maybe we just moved too fast. I loved Objection, don’t get me wrong, I still love him… Those feelings never go away overnight, however, the more I thought about it, the more this idea terrified me, and I became depressed and reclusive. The marriage, moving, everything.

Obj. and I had a few fights over the moving situation, which was strange for us. We’re usually pretty level headed and easy going, but Objection really wanted this move to Florida, and I really didn’t. We couldn’t come to an agreement… And we tried. Believe me. But honestly, things just weren’t looking up, but rather down.  So we decided to try and salvage anything we could rather than going out seperate ways.

In February I moved back into my old apartment, which, thank God I kept.

So no… Objection and I are not together. Right now, this is a period to see if this is something we really want. I believe for Objection it is, and, honestly, I feel horrible for doing this to him.  He’s moving to Florida next month, and we’re both going to be working on ourselves more than anything.  I’m dating again.   I believe he is, too.  We’re not calling it quits. Just seeing if making a lifelong commitment is something we really want to do. Marriage means a lot to me, and my family, and I don’t take divorce lightly.

I know a lot of you ladies may not agree with my decision.  But, I’m content with it. I just hope you all understand why I’m doing it. Not to hurt him. I love him. I really do. But I don’t want to be five years into a marriage and decide this was a mistake.

 

 

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9 thoughts on “Back in Business

  1. Aaawww…. im sad for you but @ same time happy if its what you´ve wanted, cant be unhappy trying to make someone happy that will be unhappy with you by knowing that you´re not happy. (sorry my english, sometimes i write a lot to explain a simples thing but english isnt my mother language)

    These post made remember when i said no to a marriage to someone that i loved but couldnt see myself leaving my world to live in his and the truth is that after almost 5 years I keep thinking on how it could have been if i did moved with him, get married (and maybe kids) cause i chose my job, my family and my simple life.
    On that year i lost my mum for cancer, had so many hanger with me that i just abandoned my life for a new one in Brazil and here Am I, finishing a degree with 30, no bf, no bff, just with my dog (i call him my latin son lol), will be an engeenier in December and who knows what i will be doing after but dont feel like leaving the sugar life till i find someone special.(and in Brazil Sugar aint easy, i get sugar once or twice a yr and never sleep with them or it might look like P4P to me.)

    All i have to wish you is happiness (cause time will help you to forget him or not) and that you get lots of sugar to make you busy so you wont think that much on whar you just left behind.

    Hugs from Rio de Janeiro,
    Regina

  2. Coucou Elsy,

    Heureuse d’avoir de tes nouvelles, parce que oui je lis ton blog ! Effectivement, j’étais très heureuse pour toi. Malheureusement, on ne peut pas tout prévoir dans la vie. Et si tu n’étais pas sûre, tu es encore jeune (et j’imagine belle) donc si vous êtes faits pour être ensemble, le temps vous réunira, n’est-ce pas ?
    Le mariage n’est pas à prendre à la légère. Avant de se présenter sous l’aspect d’une grosse bague, d’une magnifique robe et de 500 invités, je pense encore que c’est un acte d’engagement et d’amour pour lequel il faut se battre tous les jours. Ce que beaucoup de gens oublient. Malheureusement, certaines femmes de télé-réalités telles que Kardashian et cie n’aident pas à le rendre crédible et je trouve cela navrant. Donc prends ton temps et sois sûre. Même si dans notre communauté de SB, nous essayons de nous en sortir par un moyen ou par un autre, le rêve de chacune de nous toutes est quand même de pouvoir trouver au final un amour partagé (et un bon soutien financier accessoirement lol). Que la 1ère qui pense le contraire me jette la pierre.
    Quand tu dis: “I know a lot of you ladies may not agree with my decision.”
    J’ai bien envie de te dire, qui sommes-nous pour te juger Elsy ??? Tu fais ce qui est bien pour toi et… c’est tout !

    Voilà j’ai fini mon speech 😉 portes-toi bien ! Bisous Lara

  3. There’s nothing wrong with breaking off an engagement if you truly feel that you’re not ready for it… It’s definitely better to break it off now than to go through a divorce years down the road, especially when that could have been avoided. It sounds as though you definitely love the man. If you didn’t love him then you wouldn’t have broken off the engagement, right? It’s a selfless thing to do when you feel it’s just not right for the either of you. I hope you both work through things and find yourself and discover what you truly want out of life, and if that’s each other. It’s a tough thing to go through, but you sound like a strong woman. Good luck!

  4. I totally agree with that. And I bet it got Kindve awkward. It’s like any friend you might have and all of a sudden they want to make it official and your just not sure.

    Im totally nervous about this I just created my profile and been trying to read the guidelines. I have one potential guy but I’m actually afraid to meet him because he wanted to meet at his place. I refused and now we plan to meet in a public place. But it’s killing me! I keep wondering what to say what to do and if I’m good enough. I’m not fat but I’m not a skinny “perfect” lady. I’ve recently lost a lot of weight and I’ve felt really good about myself but will he think that? And if he doesn’t and low balls me is that ok? I really need help lol
    I would love if you gave me some tips ! And I hope things go well for you!
    I am enjoying your blog so far!
    Take care! 🙂

    • Ally, you are just an ignorant, selfish whore. A real SB wouldn’t marry someone just to screw him over. A whore would. An SB is a real person with real feelings and who would make a promise to someone based on their honesty. There’s more to life than grabbing the next $700 Dior scarf.

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