Hello Sugar world.
I’m back, after a few months of being MIA. I know a lot of you must have thought I’d gone off and lived happily ever after with Objection and forgotten about you all. I’ve received a copious amount of lovely emails and facebook messages from you all. It’s been such a comfort to know you all enjoyed reading my blog, and I’ve still received 100+ views per day, despite not posting. 🙂 Love you girls.
I bet you’ve all been wondering where I’ve been, as I did pretty much fall off the face of the earth…
As you girls may remember, when Objection proposed, I was elated, yet at the same time I worried a lot. Objection had been offered a job in another state, and we’d finally bought an apartment together. So, allow me to pick up where we left off whilst trying to make this short…
January was supposed to be a really exciting time for me. I had essentially got the man of my dreams. I was making the transition to move to a beautiful home, with the idea of moving to Florida. Two homes in one country, and people would have swooned at the idea, but to be honest, I adore New York. Florida doesn’t appeal to me as a place to live. (Sorry Floridaians.) I’d choose the city over the beach any day, and it caused a big rift between Objection and I… Maybe it wasn’t fair of me to ask himnotto take the job, but, honestly, I knew I wouldn’t be happy in Florida.
It was hard for me, because I’m so young, yet I felt like I was taking on a lot more than I could handle at that minute… A marriage, being a wife, and starting a family too? Maybe I’m just too immature, or maybe we just moved too fast. I loved Objection, don’t get me wrong, I still love him… Those feelings never go away overnight, however, the more I thought about it, the more this idea terrified me, and I became depressed and reclusive. The marriage, moving, everything.
Obj. and I had a few fights over the moving situation, which was strange for us. We’re usually pretty level headed and easy going, but Objection really wanted this move to Florida, and I really didn’t. We couldn’t come to an agreement… And we tried. Believe me. But honestly, things just weren’t looking up, but rather down. So we decided to try and salvage anything we could rather than going out seperate ways.
In February I moved back into my old apartment, which, thank God I kept.
So no… Objection and I are not together. Right now, this is a period to see if this is something we really want. I believe for Objection it is, and, honestly, I feel horrible for doing this to him. He’s moving to Florida next month, and we’re both going to be working on ourselves more than anything. I’m dating again. I believe he is, too. We’re not calling it quits. Just seeing if making a lifelong commitment is something we really want to do. Marriage means a lot to me, and my family, and I don’t take divorce lightly.
I know a lot of you ladies may not agree with my decision. But, I’m content with it. I just hope you all understand why I’m doing it. Not to hurt him. I love him. I really do. But I don’t want to be five years into a marriage and decide this was a mistake.